When we ask ourselves, “What does God say about marriage and love?” we’re ultimately wondering why we need Jesus in our lives, especially regarding our most intimate relationships.
The truth is God’s design for marriage and love is a beautiful reflection of His love for us, and understanding His principles can bring transformation and joy to our relationships.
So, what does God say about marriage and love? In short, He says that marriage is a sacred union between a man and woman, designed to reflect His love for us (Genesis 2:24); that love is a choice, not just a feeling (1 John 3:16-18);
that husbands and wives have unique roles and responsibilities (Ephesians 5:22-33); that forgiveness and grace are essential components of a healthy marriage.
This article will delve deeper into these principles and explore what God says about marriage and love. We’ll discover how His design for marriage can bring joy and fulfilment to our relationships and how His love can transform our marriages and relationships.
Whether you’re single, dating, or married, this article will provide valuable insights and practical advice on how to build a Christ-centred relationship that honours God.
1. Marriage Is A Sacred Covenant Before God
In the Bible, what does God say about marriage and love? He clarifies that marriage is not just some cultural tradition or legal human contract. It’s a sacred covenant relationship before Him.
Genesis 2:24 lays the foundation: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” One flesh – wow! That’s an incredibly intimate unity between husband and wife.
Marriage reflects the spiritual reality of Christ’s relationship with His bride, the Church.
Ephesians 5:31-32 says, “For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church.
So from the very first marriage between Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, God made His design abundantly clear.
Marriage is a holy, lifelong covenant of love between a man and a woman. It’s not something to be entered into lightly or selfishly.
2. Love is Patient, Kind and Humble
They say love makes the world go round. But what does true godly love look like according to the Bible? So, what does God say about marriage and love? The famous 1 Corinthians 13 passage paints a beautiful picture.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, boastful, proud or rude. It does not demand its way. It is not irritable or resentful. In other words, true biblical love is fundamentally humble! It’s all about putting the other person first.
James 3:17 reinforces this: “The wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and not hypocritical.”
It is incredibly challenging to live out day by day. We’re human and flawed. But God gives us the power to love with His fantastic patience, kind, and humble love when we yield to His Spirit. What a beautiful vision to strive for in our marriages!
3. Man And Woman Were Created For Each Other
From the earliest chapters of Genesis, we see God’s heart for marriage between a man and a woman. “Then the LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him'” (Genesis 2:18).
Did you catch that? In God’s original perfect design, He made Eve to be a helper who perfectly complemented Adam. They were made for each other!
So, what does God say about marriage and love? Genesis 2:24 says, “This is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” The intimacy, unity and clarity of God’s purposeful creation couldn’t be more precise.
My favourite Bible teacher always emphasizes God’s metaphor here. Just as there are two distinct individuals in the Godhead, He created two distinct yet unified and complementary genders in human beings.
Not for romantic reasons, as some suggest, but for the profound purpose and illustration of Biblical marriage.
4. Unequally Yoked Marriages Are Unwise
Regarding the profound question of what God says about marriage, one theme continually surfaces – the importance of spiritually unifying your spouse.
So what does God say about marriage and love? 2 Corinthians 6:14 is clear: “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership is there between righteousness and lawlessness? Or what fellowship does light have with darkness?”
The yoke is an agricultural metaphor for joining two oxen to plough a field. If the animals are mismatched in size and strength, it’s extremely difficult for them to work together productively.
This divine wisdom applies to marriage, too. When a believer is spiritually “yoked” to an unbeliever through marriage, it creates enormous strain and inevitable conflict.
Their core values, priorities and spiritual realities are opposed at the most fundamental level.
That’s not to say God cannot redeem and bless couples in this situation through radical life change. But His ideal from the beginning was a partnership between a man and woman who share the same foundational commitment to Him.
Here are sections 5-8 expanded to around 300 words each, including relevant Bible verses and written in a conversational, human-like tone aimed at a general audience:
5. Guard Your Heart And Stay Sexually Pure
When it comes to what God says about marriage and love, He doesn’t mince words about the importance of sexual purity. So, what does God say about marriage and love? Proverbs 4:23 instructs, “Guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
In today’s sex-saturated culture, saving sex for marriage is overwhelmingly countercultural. But God’s wisdom is clear: “Flee from sexual immorality…The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20).
Why does God want us to reserve sex for marriage? Because He designed it as the profound physical and spiritual uniting of a husband and wife within a sacred covenant.
It’s deeply intimate and beautiful – but incredibly powerful like fire. Playing with sexual fire before marriage tragically gets so many people burned.
But there’s good news! I know a young couple who freely admits they made mistakes sexually before their wedding day.
But they were radically transformed by God’s grace, sought accountability, and committed to purity. They cherish the fresh start God gave them and model vibrant, joyful intimacy within their marriage.
6. Love Keeps No Record Of Wrongs
We all know that no marriage is perfect. Eventually, your spouse will wrong you in some way – big or small. The real test comes in how you respond. What does God’s Word instruct about handling offences?
So, what does God say about marriage and love? “Love keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5). Ouch!
Those words sting because we’re all naturally prone to repeatedly rehearsing the wrongs done to us. But godly love makes the conscious choice to forgive and let go.
Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 6 is radical: “If you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But your Father will not forgive your transgressions if you do not forgive others.”
Does this mean stuffing hurts or sweeping real issues under the rug? Not at all. It means releasing the offence to God, extending grace and mercy, and viewing your spouse through Christ’s forgiveness toward you.
7. Don’t Let the Sun Go Down On Your Anger
Conflict is inevitable in marriage between two imperfect people. Anger expressed in unhealthy ways like shouting, sarcasm or stonewalling can quickly breed resentment and distance.
So what does God say about marriage, love, and resolving anger in a relationship? Ephesians 4:26 is clear: “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.”
Obeying this command requires intentional daily communication and conflict resolution. It means practising humility by taking responsibility for your part. It means listening and validating your spouse’s perspective.
Don’t fall into the disastrous trap of using the silent treatment! That’s emotional abuse, not healthy Biblical conflict resolution. Instead, be radically honest with each other, speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). Bring everything into the light.
Christian couples should never go to bed angry or unresolved. Even if it means blazing late into the night, we talk it through, validate feelings, apologise, forgive and wake up the following day at peace. [1]
8. Husbands, Love Your Wives Sacrificially
While instructions for wives get a lot of attention, the Bible’s mandate for husbands is even more radical and profound.
Ephesians 5:25 sets an extremely high bar: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
Husbands are called to love their wives with the same sacrificial, selfless, laying-down-your-life love that Jesus demonstrated. That’s the greatest love the universe has ever witnessed!
The passage describes this love as nourishing, cherishing, and spiritually sanctifying his wife. In other words, a husband’s role is to lead his family by prioritizing his wife’s holiness, emotional needs, and spiritual growth above his own.
This is radical stuff! It’s a love that’s action, not just warm feelings or cheap words. It’s a love of leading, pursuing, providing, protecting, and, yes, even sacrificial death to self when necessary.
9. Wives, Respect And Submit To Your Husbands
So, what does God say about marriage and love? When it comes to what God says about marriage and love, wives are given a vital calling, too.
Ephesians 5:22-24 states: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church…As the church submits to Christ, wives should also submit to their husbands in everything.”
The Bible’s concept of submission has been widely misunderstood and distorted in unhealthy ways. It does NOT mean becoming a doormat or relinquishing your intellect or opinions.
In God’s design, the husband’s leadership role carries an incredibly high responsibility to sacrifice and serve his wife, just as Christ did the Church. The wife’s role of willing, gracious submission is the balanced counterpart.
Practically, this looks like a wife showing deep respect for her husband’s leadership, even when she may sometimes disagree.
It’s about creating a supportive, encouraging atmosphere in the home. It’s about utilizing her unique gifts, strengths, and intuition to help her husband become all God intends.
Ultimately, “wives submitting” flows out of reverence for Christ and trusting His wise, counter-cultural plan for marriage. As wives, we joyfully embrace this high calling!
10. Let Your Marriage Be A Witness
Your marriage was never meant to be a private, insular thing. What does God say about making your covenant union an outward witness to a watching world?
“Live in such a way as to bring honour to the gospel,” Philippians 1:27 instructs. In other words, let your marriage point people to the greater reality it represents – Christ’s relationship with His Bride, the Church.
In our contemporary context, a healthy, thriving Christian marriage sticks out like a shining light against the landscape of moral relativism and rampant divorce. It bears powerful witness to the countercultural truths of God’s design.
Does this mean your marriage has to be perfect? Of course not. But it does mean striving for a transparent, authentic picture of God’s best – warts, weaknesses and all. It means putting your marriage on display as a testimony of grace.
11. Seek Wisdom But Avoid Unhealthy Comparisons
So, what does God say about marriage and love? In pursuing what God has to say about successful Christ-centred marriages, there’s incredible value in gleaning wisdom from other healthy couples who are further along. Proverbs 27:17 states, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
Notice the Bible doesn’t say we should compare our marriages. There’s a fundamental difference. Comparing breeds discontentment, pride, and covetousness. But learning, being challenged and sharpening one another is vital!
Every couple goes through dry, stale, or just plain hard seasons. That’s when it’s crucial to spend time with other couples modelling vibrancy, perseverance and Biblical wisdom.
My wife and I have benefited immensely from regularly engaging wise spouses who speak truth and enduring principles into our lives.
At the same time, we have to be wary of the Enemy’s tactic of unhealthy comparisons. Each marriage is a beautifully unique story that God is writing. My journey will never be a paint-by-numbers replica of another couple’s story – nor should it be.
So by all means, let’s learn and glean from one other! But let’s also celebrate each other’s diversity and find our distinct rhythm and groove.
12. Keep Christ At The Centre Of Your Marriage
When it’s all said and done, what’s the most profound insight God provides about marriage? The unmistakable priority is keeping Jesus Christ at the absolute centre – above your spouse.
In Matthew 10:37, Jesus states this clearly: “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”
This can sound harsh at first. Of course we’re supposed to love our spouses! But Jesus drives home a critical point – He alone is preeminent and worthy of our highest love, devotion and allegiance.
When we make even someone as precious as a husband or wife an idol, priorities get dangerously distorted.
So, what does God say about marriage and love? Ecclesiastes 4:12 reveals the power of this truth: “A cord of three strands is not easily broken.”
When that third vertical strand is the God of the universe holding a couple together, their marriage has an unbreakable source of strength!
My friends Dave and Natalie have modelled this by zealously guarding their prayer, Bible study, church involvement and accountability habits.
As a result, their partnership exudes a spiritual richness that’s rare. It’s clear Christ is at the very centre of their family.
What Was God’s Message About Marriage?
What was God’s message about marriage? God’s message about marriage is clear – it’s a sacred covenant, not just a cultural tradition.
From the very first marriage of Adam and Eve in Genesis, God designed it as a beautiful, lasting union between one man and one woman.
This covenant mirrors the spiritual relationship between Christ and His bride, the Church. Husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the Church sacrificially.
Wives are instructed to respectfully submit to their husbands’ leadership just as the Church submits to Christ.
Throughout Scripture, God establishes marriage as the most intimate of all human relationships, where two become one flesh. It’s meant for holy partnership, sexual purity, and providing a nurturing home for children.
While sin has distorted this ideal, God still upholds marriage as sacred and worthwhile when both spouses honour His principles.
What Is God’s purpose For marriage?
God’s primary purpose for establishing marriage goes far beyond human companionship or procreation.
In Ephesians 5, Paul reveals the profound mystery – marriage between a man and woman profoundly illustrates Christ’s relationship with His church!
So, what is God’s purpose for marriage? From the beginning in Eden, God designed marriage to be a vivid picture of His sacrificial, everlasting covenant with His people.
A husband is to love his wife unconditionally and lead her to become more like Christ. A wife must submit to and reverence her husband’s leadership just as the church follows and reveres Jesus.
This beautiful purpose is why God hates divorce and desires marriages centred on Him. Healthy Christian marriages don’t just benefit the couple – they provide a powerful witness to the world of Christ’s life-changing love for His bride.
What Promises Does God Make About Marriage?
While God makes no promises that marriage will be easy or problem-free, He does provide robust assurances regarding His purposes for this sacred covenant:
What promises does God make about marriage? In Malachi 2, He promises an inheritance of His blessing and presence for those who remain faithful in marriage.
Psalm 128 states that those who “fear the Lord” by honouring His statutes for marriage will be blessed with a fruitful household.
In the New Testament, Hebrews 13:4 reminds us that “marriage should be honoured by all, and the marriage bed kept pure.”
God promises a special grace and provision for those who uphold His standards of sexual purity.
Perhaps most encouragingly, Jesus himself declares in Mark 10, “What God has joined together, let no man separate.” God promises an unbreakable bond through all of life’s storms for those submitted to His covenant purposes.
So, while perfection may elude every marriage, God guarantees His purposes will ultimately prevail through our faithfulness. That’s a fantastic promise worth clinging to!
How Does God view marriage?
How does God view marriage? God views marriage as a sacred, holy covenant – not just a casual human contract or social construct.
From the first union of Adam and Eve, the Bible establishes marriage as a profound spiritual reality that God Himself officiates and holds as inviolable.
Genesis 2 states that a husband and wife are to be “one flesh,” speaking of the most profound intimacy and unity possible between two human beings.
This is because, as Ephesians 5 explains, the marriage union symbolizes the eternal covenant relationship between Christ and His church.
For this reason, God takes the marriage covenant incredibly seriously. Malachi 2:16 declares, “I hate divorce, says the Lord.”
Throughout Scripture, God upholds marriage as honourable, purifying, and a purposeful illustration of His relationship with those He loves.
While sin has distorted God’s original perfect design, He still views marriage as a sacred calling meant to be started with wisdom and nurtured with His principles and power.
For believers, our marriages are meant to display His everlasting love and commitment.
What Does The Bible Say About Love And Marriage?
The Bible has so much priceless wisdom about the intersection of true love and God’s design for marriage! A few key themes:
So, what does the Bible say about love and marriage? First and foremost, we see that godly love is fundamentally selfless and sacrificial, not based on fleeting emotions.
Ephesians 5 instructs husbands to love their wives “just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” Wow! That’s the purest, highest definition of marital love.
The famous 1 Corinthians 13 passage describes this countercultural love as being extremely patient, kind, humble, and forgiving – the very opposite of the narcissistic selfishness that poisons so many modern marriages.
Rooted in this selfless love, the Bible provides clear principles for cultivating a unique, intimate marriage.
This includes leaving father and mother to “cling” to one’s spouse, having a mutual commitment to sexual purity, resolving conflict quickly, sharing spiritual oneness, and making one’s marriage a testimony for Christ.
At every turn, we see God’s priority of love is sacrificial, sanctifying and centred on Him above all. It’s a high and holy calling – but it was so amazing when I walked out!
What Does God Talk About Regarding Marriage?
From Genesis to Revelation, the Bible has so much profound wisdom about God’s original design and intention for marriage. A few of the key topics He addresses:
I. The Purpose Of Marriage (Gen 2) – A husband and wife becoming “one flesh” and partners in reflecting God’s image
II. Sexual Purity (Heb 13:4) – Keeping the marriage bed pure and undefiled before God
III. Roles Of Husbands And Wives (Eph 5) – Husbands sacrificially loving, wives respectfully submitting
IV. God’s Hatred Of Divorce (Mal 2:16) – His heart is for covenant-keeping faithfulness
V. Oneness And Leaving Parents (Gen 2:24) – Marriage is the most intimate human bond
VI. Marriage Illustrating Christ And The Church (Eph 5:32) – The profound spiritual reality it depicts
Throughout, God establishes marriage as a sacred covenant to be received as His gift, celebrated with purity and intentionality.
He knows marriage is difficult with sin-scarred people like us. But He gives us purposes and roles to uplift the beauty of this design when we follow His ways wholeheartedly.
Conclusion
Ultimately, God’s vision for marriage is much richer and higher than our modern cultural narratives.
From the very beginning, He designed this covenant union between a man and woman to be a sacred object lesson of His own passionate, sacrificial, everlasting love for His people.
As explored in these 12 biblical truths, marriage is not just a social contract or emotional arrangement. It’s a spiritual reality that displays the very heartbeat of the Gospel.
From leaving and cleaving to unconditional love and respect to making Christ the centre, God has an amazingly beautiful and practical blueprint for us.
Does this mean marriage is easy or perfect for any couple? Of course not. The refining fires of two flawed people learning selfless love will always prove difficult. But God’s truths provide meaningful purpose, roles, wisdom and hope for the journey.
For those intentional about understanding and applying these ageless principles, the reward is a vibrant, joy-filled, purifying marriage that brings glory to God and leaves a powerful legacy for future generations.
It’s the profound reality of two becoming one with Christ as the cord holding them together. What could be more wonderful than that? “Christian couples should never go to bed angry…”
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